Friday, 15 July 2011

-Steele- Out to Dry.

I think it’s about time for me to hit the trail. The hand is…no longer oozing noticeably, thanks to it being copiously bandaged up (Courtesy to our resident sawbones) but Doc also says it will never function anywhere near as much as it used to, due to the bones not setting right or something (Doc takes the IKEA approach to re-assembling bones, apparently: As in, throws away the manual, plays it by ear, and winds up with a couple of pieces left over. Close enough.) but the important thing is, it’s mine, and it’s still firmly attached to my body. There is Buckley’s chance I'm going to get it cut off, no matter how gnarled and dilapidated it may look.

But as a vain motherfucker, I need to go purchase some gloves. Reason one why I am heading off for a bit.

Reason two? This goddamn house is getting me down. Well, not down, just…strange. I haven’t slept well since it happened. I’ve…Well, I’ve been hearing noises from above the garage. Chittering. I don’t know if I’m imagining it, or if I’m going insane. It’s the East Wing. It freaks the hell out of me…

…But I want to go back. I don’t lie awake scared, I lie awake…curious. Excited…Longing? No, not quite at that stage. And I know Spencer will throttle me if I head in there again, at the very least, so…

I’m getting out. I’ll have my laptop and my phone, but you guys won’t be waking up to my glorious pantsless visage like today until we’ve got another big delivery. And it is a Thursday. (I can only hope you will keep No Pants Thursday alive, in your hearts and your souls.) Until then, I’m going back to the cities. At least there we don’t have the same goddamn closed room syndrome; at least there, people can hear you scream.

I was only here for August’s free food anyway.


  1. Strange as this sounds, I'm gonna miss you, you crazy fuck. Who am I going to get into biting insult trading with now? It just won't be the same with anybody else.

    Well, stay safe and send Poe postcards. He already misses his sugardaddy

  2. Keep an eye on the hand, gloves or no. I emailed you some care instructions, since they're too long to post here in their entirety.

    See you later.

  3. Amanda my dearest, you are a supreme idiot. Read, why don't you? I'm taking my phone, I'm taking my laptop, hell, I might even tell you guys about any freelance jobs I take on. I'm just not spending any time in that house if I don't have to. It's happening again.

    So if you ever need a dose of bile, give me a call, yeah? And I'll miss Poe, but come on, it's not like we're out of work much.

  4. It's not the same if if it's not in person, love. The internet can only convey so much, after all.

    Stay safe, you pigheaded fool

  5. God you kids, acting like he won't be back. Jesus, have a flair for the dramatic, don't we? Have a good vacation, kid. Come back in one piece, eh?

  6. I know right, Spence dearest? Gosh, they don't act like that when I'm around the house, it's always "Steele, go away", "Leon, don't drop acid at the dining room table", "If you don't put your pants back on right now, you are never getting pancakes in the morning again." That said, my vacation is turning sour and I'm not even in the Big Apple. New Jersey feels...cold, though the sun was shining. And I keep hearing things. I'll make a post about it later. Once I've got the fuck out of Dodge in the morning. I don't know if it's safe to travel at the moment.

  7. I only really mind it when you're trying to break down the basement door while you're on one of your pantsless trips while I'm working. Other than that, your intoxicated behavior (that is to say, about 98% of your behavior) ranges from hilarious to a mildly acceptable level of irritating. Well, okay, I don't like it when you're destroying the house, either. Not that we haven't gotten good use out of the garage, but that may not have been the best way to install one.

    It doesn't surprise me at all that you're hearing things. Isn't that just an indication that everything's normal for you?

    In all seriousness, stay safe. I await your next post.

  8. Hey, I certainly got rid of the East Wing silliness, you can't deny that. I ought to tell THAT story sometime.

    I'm in NYC now. Finally time to write.