Saturday, 13 August 2011

-Spencer- (Untitled)

August here.
Found this in the drafts.
I'll explain my absence later.
This is more important.

confusing dreams
going to be like
Someone told me

I don't get it
Never did anything wrong
except when I did
and now it's all falling down down down
fuck, no, I don't want pity
it could mean nothing
it could mean nothing
it could mean nothing
it could mean everything
it means absolutely everything.

Fuck, Spencer, get with the program.
Steele'll be home soon
(Assuming he's not dead)
And you're going to have a lot
of explaining to do.
Got that?
So buck up.
You're going to have to cleanse eventually.
This isn't the time to lose your shit.

It's stupid. He hasn't even noticed you yet.
You could be Star. Or Nick.
He may not notice you at all.
... but that's not the problem
It's all out there now.
They know.
I know.
Why does it matter?
It all matters.
Because now you're starting to notice the similarities.
Between a monster like him
And a monster like you

How easy it is to be that.
How easy it is to nonono.

Deal with your TEAM, Spencer
your FAMILY.
You might not be able to fix everything.
But you can fix this.


  1. I thought the red words were links at first. But they aren't. So... Redlight?

    I guess I'm missing the part where Spencer is a monster. Unless I was right all along and he's a cyborg. But from what I've read it seems he's mostly a good guy.

  2. Ben, I don't see any red words.

  3. Are you colorblind, by any chance?

  4. According to professionals, not technically. But that is a possible explanation
    I see that most of the site is red and all of the links are one shade of red or another. The text above however appears to be grey.

  5. Experimentation says, yes, Nemo is colour-blind when viewing this particular page. The red text appears fine on a white background.

  6. ... Spence, we talked about this. You're not... You're not like him. Fucking hell, you're not like him. You're you, and you're brilliant, and you're everything he's not.
    Hold it the fuck together. Or come see me if you can't and I'll... fuck, I don't know, I'll hover around and be well-meaning but useless again?

  7. Intention, Spencer. I can still remember that much. Decide who you are and don't let anyone, especially yourself, tell you differently.

  8. "What you do in this world is a matter of no consequence," returned my companion, bitterly. "The question is, what can you make people believe that you have done?"